


Don’t Forget... (Iwaoi)

by killuasbestiee



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Bokuaka - Freeform, Haikyuu - Freeform, KageHina - Freeform, M/M, Pain, Sad, haikyuu angst, iwaoi - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-13 20:28:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 13,494
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28784211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/killuasbestiee/pseuds/killuasbestiee
Summary: Oikawa develops a sickness, but what does the sickness do to him? How will Iwaizumi react?
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Kudos: 9





	1. Chapter 1

________________________________

_I'm sorry, Forgive me for forgetting. I love you...._

___________________

**May 26th, 2018**

"Iwa-channnnnnn, stop bothering me and let me live my life on social media!" Oikawa whined as Iwaizumi took his phone away and shoved it into his jean pockets.

"You're getting a little out of hand with this tiktok thing shittykawa, come on let's go get something to eat." Iwaizumi growled while laughing at Oikawa.

"Fineee, but you better make up for this." Oikawa replied with a smirk on his face.

Iwaizumi just huffed and turned his head away, he simply did not care at all what he had to "make up". He was just hungry and needed something to eat fast. They walked the streets of Tokyo trying to find a restaurant that wasn't expensive but wasn't cheap either. The walked past a restaurant that they both found interesting, "Lovers meal" it read. They walked into the restaurant and found couples sitting at the booths.

"Iwa-chan, this is a couples place." Oikawa said with shock in his face.

"I don't care, I'm hungry. We'll just pretend to be a couple for now" Iwaizumi said with a scowl.

"Oh? Iwa-chan has finally caught feelings for me, I see. I mean I'm just so beautiful he can't help but fall for me." Oikawa said with a smirk and started bursting out into laughter.

"Shut it trashykawa before I beat you up" Iwaizumi said with an annoyed tone.

"I was just kidding, geez" Oikawa said while rolling his eyes.

They both sat at a booth, waiting for their waiter. Oikawa looked into Iwaizumi's eyes and just stared. Iwaizumi wasn't as beautiful as him but he was still beautiful and pretty hot. That's what Oikawa always said, and surely he wasn't in love with his best friend. God no, he would never fall in love with Iwaizumi. He just loved him as a best friend and Iwaizumi loved Oikawa the same way.

"What are you looking at?" Iwaizumi asked.

Oikawa snapped back into reality, he didn't notice that he was staring for so long.

"N-Nothing Iwa-chan" Oikawa said while rolling his eyes.

"Yeah right, I saw you looking at the girl behind me" Iwaizumi said while laughing.

"HUH? NOT EVEN, OMG IM GONNA-"

"Hello, sorry for the wait! What would you like to order?" The waiter suddenly appeared.

"Hi, Yes can I get uh-"

Iwaizumi looked up at the waitress and his facial expression was so funny. He was nervous and scared. I mean the waitress did look pretty cute, her hair was in a pony tail with 2 strands out. Her face was really pretty, her eyes were like honey skies and her body figure was an hour glass shape. Oikawa has never seen anything like her before but he wasn't interested, he already knew that his best friend was interested in her by his facial expression.

"Hi, sorry. Don't mind that pervert over there, can I get steak with rice and no broccoli. But can you replace it with some fries? and can I also have a coke. Thank you, Oh and he'll get the same thing but with a sprite" Oikawa said.

"Great! I'll be right out with your orders soon." The waiter said politely.

Oikawa watched as she walked off and into the restaurant's kitchen. He admired the way she spoke so politely, well she's probably mean and she has to play nice because this is her job.

"What. The. Hell. Oikawa." Iwaizumi said with a scary tone.

"Haha- sorry I ordered for you because you were too busy drooling over there" Oikawa said with a grin and started giggling.

"If you want her number, then ask her" Oikawa added.

"W-What I don't even like her" Iwaizumi said.

"Who are you trying to fool Iwa-chan? I'm literally your best friend and been your best friend for years, I can tell when you like somebody or not." Oikawa said while playing with the straw in his water the waitress brought out before she took their orders and turning his head to look out the window.

Iwaizumi blushed and yelled at Oikawa for being stupid. Oikawa pretended to cry and started laughing, Iwaizumi also started laughing. This is what Oikawa liked, he liked laughing with his best friend and being with him and he never wanted to forget this day. He will remember this night for the rest of his life. The waiter soon brought out the food and drinks, when she looked at Iwaizumi her eyes would light up and she would blush a little bit. Oikawa already knew she liked him just by that. He didn't mind though, because he will always be happy for his best friend and he'll never get in the way of his happiness. Soon after they finished their food, Oikawa's phone started to ring. Iwaizumi took it out of his pockets and gave it to Oikawa. The call was from Kageyama Tobio. His biggest rival in high school, of course Oikawa was in college now and Kageyama was a 3rd year in high school. But They still kept in touch and sometimes even hung out and played volleyball with each other.

"Iwa-chan, I'm going to step outside for a minute, pay the bill." Oikawa said with a wink at the last part.

Iwaizumi rolled his eyes and nodded. Oikawa went outside and accepted his phone call.

"Hey Tobio, what do you need?" Oikawa said with a soft tone. He always had a soft spot for Tobio and Iwaizumi. He never knew why, he just did.

"Oikawa-san, I need help. Hinata said he wants to go all the way, what does that mean?" Kageyama said with a panicked voice.

Oikawa started bursting out into laughter.

"Tobio First of all, stop with the honorifics. Second of all, how do you not know what "going all the way" means? You're a top and you don't even know?" Oikawa said.

"YES! I don't know, now help me out and tell me what it means." Kageyama said with a tiny whine.

Oikawa started to laugh even more.

"Tobio, It means he actually wants to do it with you. He doesn't just want you to touch him, he wants you to actually put it in." Oikawa said with a giggle.

Kageyama thanked him and hung up the phone. Oikawa just stood there and laughed with himself. How can Kageyama be so dumb sometimes he thought. He was about to go inside when Iwaizumi came rushing out the door looking happy and excited.

"What is it Iwa-chan, did you get her number or something?" Oikawa said teasingly.

"Actually I did and we're going on a date tomorrow." Iwaizumi said happily.

"T-Tomorrow? But tomorrow I'm going to the doctors to get shots, you said you'll come with me. You know how much I hate shots and the hospital Iwa-chan." Oikawa said sounding upset.

"Oikawa, You're like 22 you can go by yourself. Plus can you cut me some slack? This is my first real date we're talking about." Iwaizumi said with an annoyed facial expression.

"I was just joking, I can go by myself. Have fun on your date tomorrow, I'm gonna go to the dorm first okay? I'll see you at home." Oikawa said a smile but it was obvious he was upset.

Oikawa walked away from Iwaizumi. He didn't look back or anything, he just walked away. He wasn't going the direction the dorm was though, he was going somewhere completely different. He suddenly appeared at a house, it wasn't just any house though. It was Kageyama's house. He knocked on the door and Hinata came rushing down.

"Oikawa-san? What are you doing here?" Hinata asked.

"Hi Shoyo, I'm here for Tobio-chan. I need to talk to him." Oikawa said with a soft smile.

"Oh okay, Let me get him. Come in Oikawa-san." Hinata said while running to get Kageyama.

Oikawa let himself in and admired Kageyama's house. It was nice and clean, very pretty too. He walked to the living room and sat on their couch. He reached into his pockets for his phone and scrolled on tiktok. He then noticed a figure sitting next time him, he looked up and Kageyama was there. His hair was wet like he just got done taking a shower.

"What do you need Oikawa-san?" Kageyama asked.

"Oi Tobio, did you just take a shower?" Oikawa faked a gasp and said, "You guys did it didn't you?" Oikawa started laughing out loud.

"O-Oikawa-san! Be quiet please! Kageyama said sounding flustered.

"Now what did you really come here for?" Kageyama asked.

"I don't know, I just felt really upset because Iwaizumi is going on a date tomorrow and won't be coming with me to get shots. I hate shots and the hospital. I pretended not to be upset when I was with him but i'm actually really upset." Oikawa said.

"Well, who's he going on a date with?" Kageyama asked.

"This waitress he met at a restaurant we went to." Oikawa said with a scowl.

"Oh well, do you love him as a boyfriend Oikawa-san? Maybe that's why you're feeling like this." Kageyama said with a concerned look.

"Of course not! Why would I be in love with my best friend, that's crazy!" Oikawa shouted.

"Well I don't know then Oikawa-san. But me and Hinata have a game tomorrow, can we talk about this another day?" Kageyama said while getting up from the couch.

"You guys have a game tomorrow? But you and Chibi-chan just did- won't he be sore tomorrow?" Oikawa said covering his mouth while he chuckled.

"No he won't, we've done this plenty of-" Kageyama suddenly paused and covered his mouth.

"Oh? You guys have done this before?" Oikawa said now laughing as loud as he can.

"N-No! That's not what I meant! But I have to go to sleep now Oikawa-san, You can leave whenever you want. Just make sure to lock the door on your way out." Kageyama said with his face red.

"Actually wait, can I sleep here tonight? I don't feel like going to the dorm. I'm just so upset at Iwaizumi right now." Oikawa said with a slight grin.

"Sure, I'll bring blankets and pillows. Food is in the kitchen. Help yourself to anything." Kageyama said while walking away.

Oikawa nodded and Kageyama came back down 5 mintues later with some blankets and pillows. Oikawa tried to sleep but he couldn't. He was tossing and turning the whole night. He finally fell asleep at 2:30am.


	2. Chapter 2

**May 27th, 2018**

When Oikawa woke up, He heard sizzling and smelled bacon. He stood up and walked to the kitchen, He saw Kageyama and Hinata cooking with each other. Kageyama was hugging Hinata from behind and they were rocking side to side, he thought that was so cute and imagined somebody doing that to him. Oikawa smiled and had the urge to ruin the cuteness.

"Look at these lovebirds." He said while grabbing a piece of bacon and eating it. It tasted really good, the best ones he has ever had.

"Wow, these are really good! Who made them?" Oikawa asked while he finished the bacon.

"I did." Kageyama said looking at him.

"Wow Tobio-chan, You're a good cook." Oikawa said with a smirk.

Kageyama just nodded and smiled at Hinata. When they were done cooking, Oikawa was packing up to go home but Hinata insisted that Oikawa ate breakfast with them, of course he agreed because he couldn't be rude. They had their meal which was eggs, rice, bacon and some milk. After Oikawa finished his food, He left right away. Of course he thanked them for the food and said his goodbyes but he left quickly because didn't want to ruin their cuteness anymore and he also knew they had a game that day. While walking outside he checked his phone, it was at 10%. He looked at his messages and found 42 unread messages from Iwaizumi. All of them consisted of "where are you" or "why aren't you home" or something like that. But one message really stuck out to him, It read.

Saturday, 3:30am :

Iwa-chan :

Hey, where'd you go? Are you okay? I'm sorry if I made you upset. I know you hate hospitals and shots. I'm sorry I totally forgot that you had plans on Sunday but I can't reschedule my date. I'm worried about you, text me when you get these.

Oikawa felt so bad for making him worry. But he kinda liked that Iwaizumi was caring for him and worried for him. He's never seen that side of Iwaizumi before, well only sometimes. Oikawa rushed to the dorm, when he reached the door he grabbed his keys and put it in the lock. when he opened the door to his dorm. He saw something that he wished he never saw, his best friend sharing a kiss with the waitress in the living room. They didn't even notice him by the doorway, Oikawa just stood there with shock in his face. He gasped loudly hoping they would hear him, Iwaizumi looked up and quickly pulled away from the waitress. The girl then ran to the bathroom covering her mouth.

"It hurts, why does my chest hurt" Oikawa thought.

"Oikawa when did you come home?" Iwaizumi asked with a panicky voice.

"Not too long ago but it seems like I kinda ruined something so i'm gonna go next door to Bokuto and Akaashi's dorm. Continue what you guys were doing. Bye Iwa-chan." Oikawa said as he turned around and walked towards Bokuto's dorm.

Bokuto and Akaashi lived right next door to them. That was Oikawa's get away spot whenever he got mad at Iwaizumi. He knocked on their door and waited for a bit. The door opened and Akaashi was there.

"Oikawa-san, What are you doing here? Did you get into another fight with Iwaizumi-san?" Akaashi asked looking concerned.

"Uhm no, he just has some company over right now. Can I stay here for a bit?" Oikawa said politely.

"Yeah of course, come on" Akaashi replied.

Oikawa nodded and thanked him. He took off his shoes and walked towards their couch, he sat on the couch and took out his phone. His phone was at 4%, he asked Akaashi for a charger and Akaashi gave him one. Akaashi was making food and watched Oikawa from a far, He was getting concerned for Oikawa because he can see and hear him silently crying. Akaashi stopped what he was doing and walked over to Oikawa. He asked Oikawa what happened and Oikawa told him everything, beginning to end. Akaashi felt really bad and he tried to comfort him the best he could. He gave him some tea and made sure he stopped crying. Akaashi went back to cooking and Oikawa came to help. They were talking about school and their grades. Oikawa asked why Akaashi quit volleyball, he said it was because he wanted to become a doctor and had no time. Oikawa just nodded, he felt safe around Akaashi. He was always a mom to Oikawa.

"Say Oikawa-san, Do you love Iwaizumi by any chance?" Akaashi asked while he was putting rice into a bowl.

"Huh? No I don't." Oikawa said. There was a pause.

"Well actually I don't know... It hurts to see him fall in love with someone else." Oikawa added.

"It seems like you have romantic feelings for him Oikawa-san" Akaashi said calmly.

"I guess I do then. I don't know what to do, I can't look at Iwaizumi the same anymore." Oikawa said with tears starting to form in his eyes.

"Oikawa-san, just try your best and you know you can always stay here." Akaashi said with a soft smile.

Oikawa thanked him and told Akaashi that he had to go back to his dorm. Oikawa left and went to his dorm. When he opened the door to his dorm, he noticed that the waitress's shoes were gone.

"She left?" He thought.

Oikawa stepped inside his dorm and took of his shoes. He then hears Iwaizumi come out of their room (which they shared of course). Iwaizumi then comes out to the living room and apologizes to Oikawa.

"I'm sorry Oikawa, I didn't know you were home." Iwaizumi said with a sad face.

"It's fine Iwa-chan, I was just a little shocked." Oikawa said.

Oikawa looks at his phone, the time was 3:55. Oikawa then realized he was late for his doctor's appointment. He told Iwaizumi that he was late and he needed to go. Iwaizumi yelled at Oikawa for being so stupid. Oikawa quickly put his shoes back on and ran outside to his car. He drove as fast as he could to the doctors. He got to the doctors and apologized to them for being so late. They went into a room where Oikawa would be getting his shots. He didn't know why he needed the shots and never asked, he just took him. After his shots, the doctor came into the room with a clipboard.

"It says here that you missed your health examination last month?" The doctor said tapping his pen on the clipboard.

"Well since you're already here Tooru, can we do an examination on your health?" The doctor asked.

"Yeah, go ahead. I have nothing better to do anyways." Oikawa said.

The doctors made him do blood tests and did all sorts of tests to him. It wasn't anything harmful or bad, it was just a usual checkup. The one thing Oikawa hated the most was the blood tests, he always hated those. If he knew they were gonna make him do blood tests then he would've said no. Oikawa sat in that doctors room for what felt like hours, when really it was just 30 minutes. The doctor came back with a serious look on his face.

"Tooru, Have you felt different these past few days?" The doctor said.

"No? I've been feeling fine." Oikawa said starting to get confused.

"Tooru, you have a rare sickness. It's called without intimacy." The doctor said while shaking his head.

"Wh-What's that disease and what happens to me?" Oikawa said now looking upset.

"It's a disease where you watch someone you love, love somebody else. You can't take it anymore so you start to forget about the person you once loved. At first it's little things like their favorite color, favorite song, favorite cake. You know the little things, but soon you will forget more and more. Then your body develops this other sickness that slowly destroys you. We don't know how far you're into the sickness, we don't know if you're gonna live or not. From the looks of the results, pills should slow it down." The doctor said, with his hands clenched onto the clipboard he had.

Oikawa didn't say anything, he looked at the doctor but wasn't really looking at him. It seemed like Oikawa was looking past him like the doctor wasn't even there. Then he remembered that feeling he had in his chest when he saw Iwaizumi and the waitress. No, he wasn't in love with his best friend. He can't be! He can't be in love with him! It has to be somebody else. Oikawa thought. Oikawa thanked the doctor for letting him know and instead of going home with 3 bandaids on his arms, he went home with 3 bandaids and a packet of pills to take everyday. There were 5 different pills in total, all in their own bottle. Oikawa sat alone in his car thinking about what the doctor told him. He thought about Iwaizumi and their good days.

__________________

**July 17th, 2000**

"HAHA IWA-CHAN! YOU CANT GET-" Oikawa smacked right into a tree.

Iwaizumi started dying of laughter.

"Oikawa! THAT WAS SO FUNNY! I'M NEVER FORGETTING THIS!" Iwaizumi said, mocking him.

"WELL YOU BETTER FORGET!" Oikawa said with a mad look. He was about to cry.

**July 20th, 2016**

"Thank you Iwa-chan, for always being with me." Oikawa said as he blew out his birthday candles.

"You're welcome, I will never miss your birthday. Even if you forget me." Iwaizumi said laughing.

"Whatttt! I'll never forget you!" Oikawa said with a big gasp.

_____________________

Oikawa sat there in his car, laughing at himself. He started to drive. Then he finally realized something....

_"I'm in love with Hajime Iwaizumi."_

Oikawa started laughing even more. It's too late now, he found somebody. I guess i'll have to watch from a far while this sickness eats me alive, he thought. Oikawa finally got home, it was 8:35pm. He hid the packet of pills, he didn't want Iwaizumi to find out. When he got home, he noticed Iwaizumi was asleep on the couch.

"Was he waiting for me?" He thought.

He then noticed the TV was on, the movie was still playing. It was a romance movie. Then he noticed Iwaizumi's phone, he was on facetime with somebody. Oikawa laughed, he felt so stupid. Of course he wasn't waiting for him, he was on facetime with the waitress, watching a movie together. He laughed even more feeling so ashamed for himself. He woke up Iwaizumi and told him to go sleep in his bed before he gets a cold. Iwaizumi who's half awake, slowly walks to the room and into his bed, he forgot his phone. Oikawa picked up Iwaizumi's phone, hung up the facetime call and charged it for him. Oikawa jumped on his bed and fell asleep on the spot, he was so tired and he was hurting too much to even think about anything.


	3. Chapter 3

**June 5th, 2018**

_"I don’t remember how long it’s been since i’ve had this sickness. I'm getting better everyday, well I think I am. I don't know for sure though. Iwaizumi has been going on dates with the waitress. Her name is Asami Yamashita. Iwa-chan kept getting mad at me whenever I called her "waitress girl" so he finally told me her name. Also Iwa-chan doesn't know I have this sickness still. I can't find the right time to tell him because he's always with Asami-kun. He's planning on asking her out today! Iwa-chan asked me for help and I agreed. I'm so happy for them-. Just kidding, i'm suffering everyday. She comes over everyday, I see them together everyday. Why won't he notice that I love him. I usually spend my time with Bokuto and Akaashi now because my heart hurts just seeing them together. Only Akaashi knows I love Iwa-chan. But he doesn't know that i'm sick..."_

There's a knock at the bedroom door.

"Oikawa, I'm coming in." The voice on the other side of the door says.

Oikawa panics and quickly closes his notebook and silently puts it in the drawer in their desk. He hears the door open and Oikawa sighs of relief. Iwaizumi walked into the bedroom with nothing but a towel over this waist, he grabbed some clothes out of his drawer. Oikawa sat at the desk looking at Iwaizumi's chiseled body, his muscles and abs are definitely visible.

"I can feel your eyes burning into my back" Iwaizumi said laughing while turning his head to look at Oikawa.

"I wasn't even looking at you, Iwa-chan." Oikawa says while blushing and rolling his eyes.

"Okay whatever, anyways you know what to do right?" Iwaizumi asked.

"Yes yes, hold up the sign and record for you. Anyways, Iwaizumi what's your favorite color?"Oikawa said not even looking at Iwaizumi but instead looking at the ceiling.

"What? You already know my favorite."Iwaizumi said with a confused facial expression.

"I completely forgot." Oikawa laughed.

"It's teal, how'd you forget? You said you memorized everything about me." Iwaizumi said.

"I don't know actually." Oikawa said.

_"You'll forget minor things about them like their favorite color or cake. Then as time goes on, you'll completely forget about them then the last stage it death."_

Those words echoed in Oikawa's mind.

"Holy shit." Oikawa said out loud.

"What happened, you fucking scared me you idiot!" Iwaizumi asked.

"Nothing, I just remembered something..." Oikawa said slowly.

Iwaizumi looks at Oikawa with a suspicious face and nods like he could see him anyways. Iwaizumi then walks out of the room, closing the door behind him. Oikawa makes sure he's gone before walking to his bed and laying there, crying. He's so hurt, he doesn't even know what to do anymore. He's forgetting about his best friend, the guy he loves, the person who was always there for him up until now. Maybe it's a good thing he's forgetting about him so he doesn't feel anymore pain. Oikawa thought about a lot of stuff, he just couldn't take it anymore. He sat up, grabbed something from under his pillow and cried. What he had was a razor blade. Oikawa put the razor blade against the skin on his wrist and sliced. It stung like crazy but he thought that was better then having pain in his heart. He did this 3 more times on each wrist. When he realized what he just did, he ran to the bathroom. There was so much blood, he didn't know what to do. He washed all the blood off and walked quickly back to his room. When he got their, he saw Iwaizumi on his bed. Oikawa panicked, did Iwaizumi notice the razor blade on his bed? Luckily no blood got on Oikawa's bed. Iwaizumi noticed how panicky Oikawa looked and asked him what happened. Oikawa just said he felt a little sick and went to the bathroom. He grabbed his old volleyball sweatshirt and put it on to hide his arms.

"Why are you wearing that? It's so hot in here?" Iwaizumi asked looking confused.

"I'm cold so yeah." Oikawa said. It was true, he was cold because of the blood he lost.

Iwaizumi's phone buzzed and when he picked it up, he got panicky. He told Oikawa that Asami was here, Iwaizumi started to get bossy and told Oikawa to get his butt moving. Oikawa felt weak, he couldn't do anything but he acted like he was fine. He stood up and grabbed the sign that was under Iwaizumi's bed, the sign read "Would you like to be my girlfriend, Asami Yamashita?". Yeah it was really plain but Iwaizumi said he liked it so whatever. They moved out into the living room waiting for Asami. Oikawa took out his phone and started to record. Five minutes later, Asami knocked on the door. Iwaizumi opened the door and asked her out. Asami was really shocked, she cried. Oikawa was there holding the sign and recording but behind the camera, his tears ran down his cheeks. Iwaizumi noticed Oikawa was crying and he started laughing. Oikawa started laughing to and said he was just so happy for them. But in reality, Oikawa's heart hurt like crazy, it felt like it just shattered into a million pieces. Oikawa watched as his best friend and his new lover shared a kiss right in front of him. He smiled like it was no big deal. Bokuto and Akaashi came rushing in, Bokuto gave Iwaizumi a big hug and Akaashi just looked at Iwaizumi with happy but disappointed in his eyes. Akaashi turned his head to look at Oikawa who was signaling him that he needed to get out of here right now before he breaks down. Akaashi told Bokuto that him and Oikawa were gonna get snacks at the vending machine downstairs. Bokuto agreed and watched as they both walked out of the room and into the hallway.

"How'd you guys know?" Iwaizumi asked.

"Akaashi and I were behind Asami ever since she entered the building to when she walked into the room." Bokuto said grinning.

Asami looked shocked because she didn't notice them at all, Iwaizumi just laughed, that's when he noticed Oikawa was gone. He asked Bokuto where they went and Bokuto told him they were just getting snacks at the vending machine. They all decided to head down to the vending machines to tell Oikawa and Akaashi that they were gonna go eat out and celebrate Asami and Iwaizumi's new relationship. When they got to the vending machines, they expected to see Akaashi and Oikawa laughing while carrying a bunch of snacks. Instead they saw Akaashi hugging a crying Oikawa in his arms, rubbing his back and comforting him. Iwaizumi looked really shocked to see this and ran to Akaashi and Oikawa, Bokuto did the same but he was just jealous. Asami stayed by the doorway of the vending machine room just watching. Akaashi now just noticing them, he let go of Oikawa and wiped his tears.

"Oikawa! Why are you crying!" Iwaizumi asked looking really scared.

"He's fine Iwaizumi-san. He was just overthinking some things." Akaashi said when he spoke for Oikawa.

Iwaizumi seemed to calm down a bit but he was still concerned. Bokuto now happy that Akaashi and Oikawa were pulled away from each other, he told them about their plans. Everybody agreed and they all drove to the "Lovers meal" restaurant. The restaurant reminded Oikawa of when him and Iwaizumi went here together. Oikawa said he'll never forget the day they pretended to be a couple. He was in love with Iwaizumi more than he thought he was. They all got seated at the same booth Iwaizumi and Oikawa sat the first time but instead of Oikawa seeing Iwaizumi whenever he looked up. He saw nothing, nobody was in front of him, He was at the very end of the booth. Akaashi and Bokuto were the in the middle, Asami and Iwaizumi were the very ends at the windows. Now that Iwaizumi is here with Asami, Oikawa felt worse. I mean this is where Iwaizumi and Asami first met so it made sense. Oikawa watched in silence while 2 couples were being all lovey dovey next to him. His chest began to hurt more when he saw Iwaizumi feed Asami food. It was getting harder to breathe, Oikawa stood up and ran to the bathroom. Everybody at the table was shocked, Iwaizumi was about to run after him but Akaashi ran there first. When Akaashi got to the bathroom, he saw Oikawa's back, he was facing the wall.

"Oikawa-san? Are you okay?"Akaashi asked, slowly making his way to face Oikawa.

"Oh hi Akaashi, i'm fine." Oikawa said as he turned around to face Akaashi.

"THAUD"

"OIKAWA-SAN! OIKAWA-SAN!!" Akaashi can be heard yelling from the bathroom. Luckily he caught him before his head hit the bathroom floor.

Akaashi saw blood on Oikawa's hoodie. He unzipped Oikawa's hoodie and gasped loudly. The cuts on his wrists opened up, the blood from his wrist were all over Akaashi. Bokuto rushed inside the bathroom and gasped when he saw Oikawa, he quickly ran to his boyfriend who was now crying. Bokuto called the ambulance and they rushed over. Iwaizumi and Asami were oblivious to what happened but Iwaizumi was really concerned for his best friend and asked Akaashi all sorts of questions. Akaashi answered them as best as he could because he really didn't know anything. When they all finally got to the hospital it was already 9pm. Visiting hours were already over and they weren't a loud inside. They all went back to their dorms scared, upset and concerned for Oikawa. Asami was the most concerned out of them all, when she went to Iwaizumi's dorm she started to cook food to bring to Oikawa in the morning.

_heart beat is getting fainter and fainter._


	4. Chapter 4

**June 6th, 2018**

They all went to the hospital to visit Oikawa. They were all scared and they didn't know what to expect. They all stood at the door, Akaashi was holding milk bread, Bokuto was holding strawberry milk, Asami was holding the food she cooked for him which was rice porridge and Iwaizumi... He was holding Oikawa's favorite flowers, which were obviously roses. Iwaizumi slowly opened the door.

"Oikawa, we're all here to see-"

Iwaizumi stood there in shock when he saw his best friend looking out the hospital window with bandages on his arms.

"Oikawa, what happened to your arms..?" Iwaizumi asked while tears fell down from his eyes. It hurt to see him laying on the hospital bed, looking weak.

Oikawa slowly turned his head, you can clearly see he's been crying ever since he got to the hospital.

"Iwaizumi? Akaashi? Bokuto? Asami-chan? Oikawa said with a weak voice.

"OIKAWA, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR ARMS?" Iwaizumi raised his voice. He didn't notice Oikawa called him "Iwaizumi".

"Iwaizumi-san, don't raise your voice. Can't you see he's clearly weak?" Akaashi said with a serious tone.

Iwaizumi didn't care though, he needed to know what the hell happened to Oikawa. Why were his arms covered in bandages? Why is he here in the first place? What the hell happened to him? Iwaizumi thought to himself. They all slowly walked towards Oikawa holding the things they brought and placing them on the windowsill.

"Iwaizumi, I'm sorry. I-I did something terrible to myself." Oikawa said weakly.

"Oikawa-san, don't talk if you're weak." Akaashi said calmly.

"H-He has the right to know." Oikawa smiled weakly.

"I'll tell him then, you just relax." Akaashi said smiling at Oikawa.

"Well come on and tell me!" Iwaizumi said impatiently.

"When I found Oikawa in the bathroom, He told me he was fine but suddenly fell and luckily I caught him before his head hit the floor but when I looked at him..." Akaashi's voice started to break.

"I-I saw blood coming from his wrist, a-and it looked like he c-cut himself. T-There were cuts all over his wrist, about 4 of them on each side." Akaashi said now crying uncontrollably.

Bokuto stood by Akaashi's side and hugged him. Asami looked shocked and she didn't know what to do, her eyes were teary but she didn't cry.

"W-What? O-Oikawa W-why would you do that? What made you do that!" Iwaizumi said raising his voice.

"Y-you'll find out soon Iwaizumi." Oikawa said crying.

"I NEED TO KNOW NOW!" Iwaizumi said now shouting.

"Iwaizumi, P-please don't shout..." Oikawa said.

Iwaizumi didn't care but he let it slide. He genuinely cared for Oikawa. He couldn't stand looking at Oikawa who was weak, he left without saying goodbye and Asami left with him. They just quietly walked out the room. Oikawa smiled when he saw Iwaizumi leave because he knew that he couldn't stand seeing him on the hospital bed. Oikawa didn't care though, he just wanted what was best for Iwaizumi and maybe it was best if he didn't visit Oikawa anymore. He already knew that he was forgetting his best friend. He loved his best friend so much but it will have an affect on Iwaizumi's mental health if he found out that he was forgetting him.

"Oikawa, When are you getting out of the hospital?" Bokuto asked.

"I won't be able to leave at all, Bokuto." Oikawa hesitated while saying that, he started to cry even more.

"W-why not? It's only a few cuts right..?" Bokuto asked again.

"Not just a few cuts, I lost a lot of blood and I'm sick..." Oikawa said as he looked out the hospital window with a river of tears streaming down his face.

"S-sick? When and how?" Akaashi butt in.

"I don't remember, maybe 4 or 5 days ago." Oikawa said as he wiped his nose with his hands.

"W-what's the sickness..?" Bokuto asked, he and Akaashi were expecting the worst sickness possible.

"So many questions, I'm so tired." Oikawa chuckled.

"But it's a sickness where I forget about the person I love because they're falling in love with somebody else, you guys obviously already know who I love and that's Iwaizumi. It would be minor things at first, like today I forgot Iwaizumi's favorite color and I still can't remember it even though he told me. Next after the minor things, it goes on to major things like maybe his birthday, name and our memories. Finally I completely forget about him and then I die..." Oikawa said that so calmly like it never affected him at all.

Now at this point everyone in the room is bursting into tears. Nobody said anything else, they didn't have the courage to ask anymore questions after that sad explanation Oikawa told them. Akaashi fell down to his knees, Bokuto ran to his side and comforted him. They then walked to Oikawa and gave him a big hug, they all sobbed together.

"Wait, why do you call him Iwaizumi?" Bokuto asked breaking free from the hug.

"Is that not what i'm supposed to call him? Isn't he my best friend? I can't him Hajime without him saying I can, that's disrespectful." Oikawa said smiling slightly.

"Yeah but-."

Akaashi gave Bokuto a fierce look, it's like the look was saying "Say anything else and i'm going to kill you" to Bokuto. He went quiet after that, Akaashi gave Oikawa the rice porridge that Asami made him and gave him the milk bread. He asked the nurses for a vase, he put water into the vase along with the beautiful white and red roses. Akaashi watched Oikawa slowly chew his milk bread.

"Say Oikawa-san, did they give you any pills?" Akaashi said blowing his nose.

"They did but I stopped taking them after two days because why should I take them if they don't even have a cure for this stupid sickness. I'm gonna die anyways so it doesn't even matter. I means yeah the pills slow down the sickness that's gonna kill me but they don't do anything to my brain. I'm going to forget Iwaizumi anyways so what's the point. I rather die than forget Iwaizumi." Oikawa said.

Akaashi and Bokuto just nodded. They watched him eat the rice porridge which tasted like lipstick to him. They made Oikawa laugh to make it seem like he was at home because the hospital will be his home now until the day he passes.

____________________

"Hajime! Slow down where are you going?" Asami yelled at him.

"I'm going to my favorite place." Iwaizumi said without looking back.

"And where's that?" Asami asked.

"Where me and Oikawa shared our first hug." Iwaizumi said still walking and he never stopped until he got to the place he wanted to go. Asami trailed behind him the whole time, never letting Iwaizumi go out of sight.

He stopped at this park, it was a small playground. He looked at it and started to tear up, he felt guilty that he wasn't there for Oikawa as much anymore. He didn't know what to do, he was speechless. He walked towards the swing where he remember when Oikawa cried because he fell off. He started to cry uncontrollably at this point, he went to every piece of equipment. It was like every playground equipment had its own story and memory, i mean of course it did because Iwaizumi and Oikawa came here all the time when they were kids. Asami watched from a far watching her boyfriend break down, she didn't know what to say. She's never been through anything sad like this before, her life was completely perfect. She's been bullied once or twice but she's never experienced pain like this.Iwaizumi started to walk away from the playground, he was walking home. Asami went home after seeing her boyfriend break down at a park. She left before Iwaizumi, she couldn't stand seeing him like that. When Iwaizumi got home, he went to his bed and laid there. He ignored every notification he got on his phone even the ones from Oikawa. He laid there in his bed remembering what he saw at the hospital, his best friend looking weak and tired like he was already on the verge of death. The more he thought about it, the more he started to cry. Iwaizumi cried himself to sleep that night.


	5. Chapter 5

**June 7th, 2018**

"WHY DIDN'T YOU PICK UP YOUR PHONE IWAIZUMI? I WAS SO WORRIED ABOUT YOU!" Oikawa yelled on the phone.

"I'm sorry, I fell asleep." Iwaizumi said, Akaashi couldn't really hear his voice from even though Iwaizumi was on speaker.

"You fell asleep for 12 hours." Oikawa said with an eye roll acting like Iwaizumi could see him.

"Yeah, I know I did. Anyways I'm coming to the hospital soon, do you want anything? Milk bread? Onigiri? Water? Flowers?" Iwaizumi said, you can here him getting his sweater over the phone.

"I want all of them and can you bring Tobio-chan and chibi-can too? Or like ask them to come? I need to tell Tobio-chan something." Oikawa said with a smile.

"What do you need to tell Tobio?" Iwaizumi asked, the tone in his voice changed.

"That's a secret Iwaizumi." Oikawa laughed.

"W-what? But I'm your best friend! Also can you stop calling me Iwaizumi? It's so weird that you call me that." Iwaizumi said in a disgusted tone.

"But I've called you "Iwaizumi" all my life. Why can't I call you that now?" Oikawa asked, Akaashi saw Oikawa's eyebrows frown into a question.

"What are you talking about Oikawa? Did you forget the nickname you gave me?" Iwaizumi said laughing jokingly.

"Like I ever would! I'll never forget anything about you!" Oikawa said defensively.

"Sureee, you forgot my favorite color remember?" Iwaizumi said chuckling.

"Yeah yeah whatever, I have to hang up now. Bye, make sure to bring Tobio-chan and chibi-chan!" Oikawa hung up the phone so quickly. He didn't give Iwaizumi time to say goodbye.

Oikawa put his phone down, he was shocked that he was forgetting more and more about Iwaizumi. At this point Oikawa doesn't remember Iwaizumi's nickname, his favorite color, his favorite cake, his dream job and the worst one is his first name. Iwaizumi is just Iwaizumi to him now, not Iwaizumi Hajime or Iwa-chan. It's just plain old Iwaizumi, there's no context or detail. Oikawa looked at Akaashi with tears in his eyes, Akaashi quickly ran to give him a hug.

"It's okay Oikawa-san. I know this is hurting you physically and mentally but you have to be strong okay?" Akaashi said rubbing Oikawa's hair.

"A-Akaashi, what was Iwaizumi's nickname that I gave him?" Oikawa said with tears running from his eyes and snot coming from his nose.

"It was uh, "Iwa-chan". You always called him that until now." Akaashi said hesitating with every word.

"Oh, I see." Oikawa said while wiping his nose.

Oikawa felt bad for lying to his best friend. Akaashi felt bad for not telling Iwaizumi, he wanted to tell him so bad but Oikawa begged him not to tell Iwaizumi. He doesn't want to mess up Iwaizumi's mental health, but Akaashi thinks that hiding this from him and suddenly passing away would hurt Iwaizumi even more but he didn't say anything. Thirty minutes went by, Oikawa heard a knock at the door.

"Oikawa-san, It's me Tobio and Shoyo. We're gonna come in." Kageyama's voice echoed in Oikawa's mind.

"He actually brought them?" Oikawa thought as he laughed to himself.

"Tobio-chan, No need to be so formal." Oikawa laughed even more.

Iwaizumi walked in bringing milk bread, onigiri, water and a pretty bouquet of roses. He walked up to Oikawa and gave him the roses, Iwaizumi's face was really red. Oikawa started to wonder what was going on. Iwaizumi pulled a ring from out of his pockets, Oikawa gasped.

"A wedding ring? Why? I thought he was with Asami chan." Oikawa thought to himself.

"O-Oikawa, I love you a lot and I-I want you to be my boyfriend, will you a-accept this promise ring?" Iwaizumi said, his hands were shaking like crazy.

"I-Iwaizumi, I thought you were with-"

Oikawa sighed, "I-I love you too."

Iwaizumi's face gleamed with glee, he was so happy. He leaned in for a kiss, Oikawa could feel Iwaizumi's warmth even though he was still far away, Iwaizumi's lips placed onto Oikawa's. Oikawa woke up with sweat all over him like he just had a nightmare, he looked around the room. Nobody was with him or so he thought. The room was dark but lightly lit from the moon, Oikawa looked at the clock that read "2:30am".

"What kind of fucking dream was that? I like him that much, I had a dream about him?" Oikawa laughed to himself.

"Had a dream about who?" A voice from the darkness said.

"A dream about Iwaizumi, It was so funny." Oikawa said, not paying attention to who he was talking to.

"A dream about Iwaizumi? That's so weird, what was it about?" The voice asked.

"He came to visit me and asked me out, we kissed but I woke up." Oikawa said smiling brightly.

"Oh, I see." The voice laughed.

"I'm straight Oikawa, I would never kiss you. That's just disgusting, I have my beautiful girlfriend here. I don't need you anymore" Iwaizumi and Asami emerged from the darkness with an evil smirk on him, laughing together, laughing at Oikawa.

Oikawa felt so attacked, he's never felt like this before. He started to hyperventilate and started to have a panic attack. He didn't know what to do they kept coming closer to him, yelling out disgusting words to him.

"I'll never date you, I'm not gay." Iwaizumi laughed.

Oikawa's eyes shot open, he was breathing heavily. He looked around the room and realized this wasn't his usual room. He looked over to his left and saw a person he's never seen before by his side, sleeping on the chairs next to him. Oikawa squinted his eyes to see if the person resembled anybody he knew but he couldn't remember. He tapped on the so-called stranger's shoulder. They stranger woke up and looked straight at Oikawa, he then started to remember who it was.

"Iwaizumi, FUCK it's Iwaizumi. How did I not remember, I need to remember. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!" Oikawa's thoughts were so loud in his mind he thought Iwaizumi could hear them.

Iwaizumi gasped, "Oikawa! Are you okay? Do you need water? Do you need anything?"

Oikawa slowly sat up but ached in pain. Iwaizumi tried to made Oikawa lay back down, he refused and insisted he was okay. It felt like everything Oikawa thought about just vanished, he looked straight in Iwaizumi's eyes.

"Iwaizumi... right?"

_______________________________

When Iwaizumi walked into the room, Oikawa was sound asleep. Iwaizumi looked at the precious Oikawa and smiled, He looked so peaceful laying there. Iwaizumi wondered why Oikawa was still in the hospital, his arms were already better. He's asked Akaashi before but Akaashi just told him that Oikawa was staying there for mental health reasons, which made sense because Oikawa wasn't in the right state of mind. He started to talk to Oikawa even though he couldn't hear him.

"Hey, you know my uhm Asami broke up with me. She said I wasn't spending time with her anymore and she didn't need someone like me. Heh yep, it kinda hurt but I have other people to take care of, like you. I don't know what happened and I don't know what's going on with you but just talk to me like we used to. Tobio and Shoyo are here, they're waiting outside. I want to wake you up but I don't want to ruin you sleep, you really need it." Iwaizumi started to tear up, he fought back his tears.

Kageyama and Hinata walked in, Hinata walked over to Oikawa and smiled. Kageyama then walked over to Oikawa, Everyone knew that Kageyama looked up to Oikawa so seeing the person he wanted to be hurt him a lot. He doesn't like crying in front of people but this was an exception, he started to sob silently. Iwaizumi started to noticed Oikawa's heart rate was going up, it was going up fast. The beeping from the machines we're getting faster and faster, he ran to the button to call for the nurses and doctors. Kageyama and Hinata stood is shock, Hinata had his hand over his mouth to cover his muffled words. Kageyama's mouth was open, he put his face into his hands shaking his head. Then Oikawa started to twist and turn in his sleep like crazy, the nurses finally reached his room and slammed open the door. They quickly rushed to Oikawa's side and transferred him into another room, now he had more machines hooked up to him. Iwaizumi told Kageyama and Hinata that he was sorry they had to witness that and they should go home. They both agreed to go home and said it wasn't Iwaizumi's fault, as Iwaizumi watched as they walked away holding each other's hands. Oh how he missed Asami, He needed to apologize to her right now. He took out his phone and tried to text her but he soon found out Asami had blocked him, he went to her instagram and realized that she had a new boyfriend. They were kissing in one of her post.

"A new boyfriend already? We just broke up a few hours ago." Iwaizumi thought.

He read the caption and it said "Best boyfriend of the year goes to Kindaichi". He looked at the picture more closely and realized it was Kindaichi in the photo. Iwaizumi texted him right away.

June 7th, 2018

_Iwaizumi :_

"Hey, you got a girlfriend now huh?"

_Kindaichi :_

"Yeah well, I've been dating her for a year now but we decided to keep it private. Today we just made it public!"

_read by Iwaizumi :_

"A YEAR? THEN WHY DID SHE DATE ME? WHAT WAS I TO HER?" Iwaizumi was now mad and he was crying. He decided to go into Oikawa's room and take a nap on the chairs. Yes, he was upset but he couldn't leave Oikawa's said no matter what happened. Iwaizumi sat down in the chair next to Oikawa's bed and drifted off into sleep.

The light tapping on his shoulder woke him up, he thought it was a doctor telling him he needed to go home but it was Oikawa. He was so happy to see him wake and ALIVE.

_______________________________

"Iwaizumi... right?" Oikawa said.

"What do you mean "right" of course it's me, who else would it be?" Iwaizumi said rolling his eyes.

"Sorry I kinda forgot." Oikawa chuckled.

"Stop with your games Oikawa, like you would ever forget me." Iwaizumi laughed.

Oikawa looked out the window that was in his new room.

"Yeah, like I ever would..." Oikawa said quietly

________________________________


	6. Chapter 6

**June 8th, 2018**

"So did the doctor's tell you anything about why I was like that yesterday? Iwa... Iwaizumi" Oikawa said panicking in the inside.

"They couldn't tell me any details, but they said that you were gonna be okay. Also Tobio and Shoyo were here yesterday, they also witnessed the whole thing..." Iwaizumi said with a sigh.

"Oh, they were? well let's stop talking about this, I don't want to start crying uhm anyways where's Asami? She didn't come today?" Oikawa said eating the milk bread Iwaizumi brought him.

Iwaizumi's face became more sad and he looked down at his feet.

"About that, she broke up with me and then I found out she was dating Kindaichi for a year now." Iwaizumi said with his voice breaking.

"A year..? Does Kindaichi know? How did you not know she was dating Kindaichi?" Oikawa said with a concerned look on his face.

"Apparently they've been keeping it really private for a while and they just announced it to the public yesterday." Iwaizumi said.

"How'd you find out? Did Kindaichi tell you?" Oikawa said asking more and more questions.

"I don't wanna talk about right now Oikawa." Iwaizumi snapped at him.

"Oh okay, sorry I pressuring you." Oikawa said looking out the window again.

"Why do you keep looking out there? There's nothing out there, it's a grass." Iwaizumi said rolling his eyes.

"It... It helps me remember the person I love the most, I'm kinda forgetting about them at the moment..." Oikawa said hesitantly.

"Forgetting about who-"

The door suddenly opened and Oikawa turned his head to see Akaashi and Bokuto slowly walking in. Oikawa shouted Akaashi's name in happiness, he then signaled Bokuto to get Iwaizumi out of the room. Bokuto asked the boy to go get some food with him, Iwaizumi obviously said yes because he was starving. As they left Akaashi noticed something wrong with Oikawa, he got thinner and more pale than before. Akaashi walked closer to Oikawa and gave him a big hug, a tight hug, one that he'll hopefully never give Bokuto unless they're together on their death beds. Akaashi told Oikawa to eat the rice porridge he made for him, so he did. It was delicious according to Oikawa, it tasted better than Asami's.

"How you holding up Oikawa-san?" Akaashi asked.

"Not good, my stopped taking in specific foods so I can't get my nutrition. I also almost told- dang it what's his name... fuck fuck fuck fuck." Oikawa panicked as he started to forget more and more.

"His name is-"

"Don't tell me, please just don't. I can remember myself." Oikawa said as he cut off Akaashi.

But the thing was, Oikawa never remembered his name and Akaashi never told him. Bokuto and Iwaizumi got back, they brought Oikawa some KFC. It was one of Oikawa's favorite REAL meals, he was so excited. He took a biscuit and bit into it and swallowed it, but a few seconds later he covered his mouth like he was about to puke. Akaashi noticed what was happening and quickly put a trash can near Oikawa and he stepped away. Bokuto and Iwaizumi turned the other way when he saw Oikawa puking into the garbage. Akaashi ran over to him and started rubbing his back to comfort and support him. Oikawa stopped puking and Akaashi went out the room to get a nurse.

"I suddenly feel tired now, haha" Oikawa said with a soft smile.

"Oikawa, are you really okay? Are you hiding something from me?" Iwaizumi asked looking concerned.

"No, I'm really fine." Oikawa said looking out the window.

"There you go again, looking out the window." Iwaizumi said trying to get Oikawa to look at him.

"I'm trying to remember something but I don't know what I'm supposed to remember." Oikawa said as he squinted his eyes.

Bokuto gasped slightly and turned away to start crying. Akaashi and the nurse came back, Akaashi noticed Bokuto was crying and took him out the room. The nurse took Oikawa's puke bag and replaced it with a new clean trash bad. Iwaizumi could feel a piece of his heart chip a away everything Oikawa talked to him, it felt like he wasn't talking to him as his best friend but as a stranger. The door suddenly started to open up and Oikawa looked to see Kageyama and Hinata at the door. Oikawa was overjoyed.

"Tobio-chan! Come here I had something to tell you!" Oikawa said shouting.

"Can you get this guy out please?" Oikawa whispered to Hinata.

"Sure. But isn't it rude to call you best friend "this guy"? I mean he has a name." Hinata whispered back.

"Really? He never told me his name and I'm certainly not his best friend, he just came here with Bokuto." Oikawa said whispering back.

Oikawa shooed Hinata away and Hinata brought Iwaizumi out with him, he was confused on why Oikawa said Iwaizumi wasn't his best friend. Didn't they grow up together? he thought. he decided to asked Iwaizumi if something happened between them.

"Iwaizumi-san, did something happen between you and Oikawa-san?" Hinata asked as he turned to look at Iwaizumi. The height difference was real, he had to be a foot taller than Hinata.

He turned to look at Hinata.

"Nothing happened between us why?" Iwaizumi said now looking confused.

"Well Oikawa told me to get you out the room so he could talk to Tobio alone but he called you "this guy". I told him that it was a little rude calling him "this guy" considering he's been your best friend for so long but Oikawa looked at me confused and said-"

"HINATA MY OWL!" Bokuto yelled across the other side of the hallway.

"BOKUTO-SAN!" Hinata said running towards him and Akaashi.

Iwaizumi ran after Hinata because he was now curious on what Oikawa said. Akaashi shot Hinata a look that said "come with me for a bit". Akaashi was scary when it came to not telling secrets because he was so serious about it. He politely asked Hinata to come with him for a bit and Hinata gladly agreed but he was nervous at first. Iwaizumi tried to go after them but Bokuto told him that Oikawa needs him at his side instead of Kageyama. As they were walking to his room they saw Kageyama rush out of the room, Kageyama spotted the two boys and quickly explained them to what was happening to Oikawa.

"GUYS HELP! OIKAWA IS COUGHING A LOT AND I THINK HE HAS A FEVER, HIS HEAD IS VERY HOT AND HE'S SWEATING LIKE CRAZY!" Kageyama yelled.

Just then a doctor and a few nurses rushed past them to Oikawa's room. Iwaizumi rused to the door but the nurse told him that he couldn't be in here right now, they closed Oikawa's door and locked it. They covered the little window on the door to make sure no one was peeking through. Just then Akaashi and Hinata came back to wherever they went, Hinata looked completely fine. Akaashi asked what was going on and Kageyama told him what happened. Iwaizumi told Kageyama to explain why he started coughing in the first place.

"I don't know what happened, he was talking to me just fine and then he started to cough like crazy. He told me that he was fine and he just needed some water but when I looked at him, he had sweat all over him and when I went to feel his forehead. His forehead was burning hot and he started to throw up everywhere." Kageyama explained.

"I need to know now, WHAT IS HAPPENING WITH OIKAWA! YOU GUYS PROBABLY ALL KNOW, ESPECIALLY YOU AKAASHI. BOKUTO AND HINATA YOU PROBABLY BOTH KNOW TOO." Iwaizumi shouted, he was super angry. Angrier than he's ever been.

"Calm down Iwaizumi-san-"

"NO I CAN'T CALM DOWN BECAUSE YOU GUYS ARE CLEARLY KEEPING SOMETHING FROM ME! AKAASHI I THOUGHT YOU KNEW BETTER!" Iwaizumi screamed as tears ran down his face.

"GODDAMMIT IWAIZUMI! OIKAWA IS SICK. HE'S SICK. HE SAW YOU FALL IN LOVE WITH ASAMI AND HE FELL SICK. YOU WERE OBLIVIOUS TO HIS FEELINGS! HE LOVED YOU IWAIZUMI AND YOU TOLD ME YOU LOVED HIM! REMEMBER THAT? WHY DIDN'T YOU CONFESS TO HIM INSTEAD OF FINDING ANOTHER PERSON TO DATE? HUH? HE'S SICK AND WE DON'T KNOW IF HE'S GONNA MAKE IT OR NOT. WE DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH TIME HE HAS LEFT. OH YEAH I FORGOT, HE'S FORGETTING ABOUT YOU." Bokuto yelled at Iwaizumi. He was so fed up with him. Akaashi had to pull Bokuto's arm so he didn't hurt Iwaizumi.

"W-what? Forgetting about me? You're kidding." Iwaizumi laughed.

"No, I'm not kidding Iwaizumi. He's really forgetting about you, he doesn't even know your name or who you are anymore. He doesn't remember anything about you... He didn't want us to tell you because he didn't want you to get hurt." Bokuto said quietly with tears streaming down his face. Kageyama and Hinata started to cry because they didn't know either.

"D-dammit, why didn't you tell me? I-I'm his best friend." Iwaizumi's voice was breaking and tears were coming from his eyes nonstop.

"You're not his best friend Iwaizumi-san, you're his crush and lover in his eyes." Akaashi added, giving Iwaizumi a big hug.

Iwaizumi hugged Akaashi back and everyone else joined in. At this point everyone was crying and snot was coming from their noses, their friend was going to die and they couldn't do anything. The doctor and nurses came out the room with a very serious look on their face.

"He's okay for right now, he's sleeping he'll be awake in a few hours. But we don't know how much time he has, maybe a month or 2. Please cherish the moments you have with him." The doctor said giving Iwaizumi a pat on the back and walking away. The nurses followed the doctor away.

Everyone rushed into the room to see a weak and frail Oikawa laying but still breathing. Iwaizumi sat on the chair next to Oikawa's bed and cried, He grabbed Oikawa's hand and held onto it very very tightly.

"Say Kageyama, you were talking to Oikawa before this all happened right? What did he say to you?" Hinata asked.

"Oh... He was uhm, let's not talking about it."Kageyama said.

Everybody hummed in response to Kageyama. Iwaizumi cried for about an hour. Everybody soon left to go home but Iwaizumi stayed. He couldn't let Oikawa go for one second, he needed to be by his side at all times. He slept at the hospital that night, waiting for Oikawa to wake up like the doctor said he would.


	7. Chapter 7

**June 9th 2020**

When Iwaizumi woke up, he saw Akaashi and Bokuto standing behind him. He noticed Oikawa was still sleeping, he let go of his hand and turned around to look at Akaashi. Akaashi told Iwaizumi to go home and take a shower, he refused but Akaashi made him. When Iwaizumi went home Akaashi sat in the sit he sat in, he started to cry knowing Oikawa didn't have much time left. Bokuto went to Akaashi's side and hugged him tightly like he was never gonna see him again. They heard coughing and gagging from the bed and looked over to see Oikawa sitting up, coughing and gagging signaling to get a trash bin. Oikawa puked a lot this time and he was weak, the only things he could eat without throwing up were milk bread, KFC, apples, bananas and some vegetables. He could only drink milk and water, soda and juice made him really sick so he was prohibited to have them.

"Akaashi? Bokuto? What are you doing here?" Oikawa said weakly.

"We're here to see you and talk to you." Bokuto said with a slight smile.

"Oikawa-san, how are you feeling? Do you remember what happened yesterday?" Akaashi asked.

"Yeah, I remember talking to Kageyama about this guy. I don't remember his name or what he looks like, but I do remember talking about a guy." Oikawa said looking confused.

"Oh, do you know who Iwaizumi Haijme is?" Bokuto asked.

"No... why are you asking?" Oikawa said now looking concerned.

"I was just wondering." Bokuto said rolling his eyes.

"Bokuto-san, don't pressure him." Akaashi said giving Bokuto a scowl.

Oikawa could feel his sickness coming in, he started to cough up blood and he started to puke. He covered his mouth to make sure blood wasn't getting on the mattress but it wasn't working at all. There was blood, a lot of blood, Akaashi was really concerned but Oikawa waved his hand to tell them he's fine. Akaashi didn't care thought, he quickly pressed the button and a few minutes later doctors and nurses came rushing in. They did their best to calm Oikawa down, they changed his sheets because there was blood all over, they gave him some pain killers and told him to take a shower to wash off the blood from his body. The doctors took Akaashi out to talk and Bokuto stayed with Oikawa to monitor him. Oikawa got out of bed but when he tried to walk he fell right on the floor, Bokuto rushed over to him and helped him to the bathroom. Oikawa thanked him with a smile and got into the shower, taking his clothes off and turning on the water. Nurses gave Bokuto some fresh clothes for Oikawa to where and a towel. A few minutes after Oikawa got into the shower, Akaashi came inside the room with a serious look on his face. Bokuto wanted to ask but Akaashi didn't even bother to pay attention to Bokuto, he was worried really worried. Akaashi knocked on the bathroom door.

"Oikawa-san, are you okay?" Akaashi said opening the door.

"I-I'm fine, I'm just feeling a little light headed, I'll be okay." Oikawa said in a weak voice.

"Oikawa-san I'm gonna come in okay?" Akaashi said hesitantly.

"No, No I'm really o-"

*THUD*

"Oikawa-san! NOT AGAIN! BOKUTO-SAN GET A NURSE PLEASE!" Akaashi screamed.

Just as Bokuto ran to the button, Iwaizumi rushed into the room carrying roses and milk bread. Nurses and doctor's once again rushed into the room, they grabbed Oikawa and put towels around him.

"HIS PULSE IS FADING AWAY, HURRY GET HIM INTO THE EMERGENCY ROOM NOW!" The doctor yelled to the nurses.

The boys watched as Oikawa got dragged away, Iwaizumi tried to chase after them but Akaashi stopped him, telling him that they'll see Oikawa later and just let him be right now. Iwaizumi sat down with his hands in his face, slowly breaking down. Akaashi went over to Bokuto and hugged him tightly, Iwaizumi looked up and felt jealousy run through his buddy. It sucks that he didn't have anyone there to hug, everything was too much at the moment and he hated it. The doctor walked into the room and told them where Oikawa was, he always told them that Oikawa's condition was not good and they needed to be quiet when they entered his room. The boys agreed and walked as fast as they could to Oikawa. When they got to the room they saw him sleeping on his bed, he had an oxygen mask on and he was sleeping. His pulse was a bit weak but he would be okay like the doctor said he would. Iwaizumi cried and cried next to Oikawa, he didn't know what to do or say. Akaashi did his best to try and comfort Iwaizumi but he was also breaking down at this painful sight.

"Oikawa, why. Why didn't you tell me that you were sick, why didn't you tell me you were forgetting about me. I love you and I'm so sorry for hurting you, I was scared you didn't love me back." Iwaizumi said as tears and snot streamed down his face.

"Iwaizumi-san, it's 11:00pm let's go home. Okay? You can stay over at our place even though we live right next to each other, I don't want to leave you alone. Come on let's go Iwaizumi-san. " Akaashi said as politely as he could.

Iwaizumi didn't put up a fight this time, he agreed. They went home and Akaashi told Iwaizumi that he could sleep on their bed, but he refused. He rather sleep on the couch, he didn't want them to pity him because his crush was dying. Akaashi made Iwaizumi some food and told him if he needed anything, he could ask them. Iwaizumi nodded in response and goes to take a shower, their dorm is just like Iwaizumi and Oikawa's so he knows his way around but it also hurts him because he can pinpoint where Oikawa's framed pictures are hanging. He felt terrible, he had so many regrets he just wanted to die.

________________________________

_"Tooru, You have to wake up. You can't leave yet. You have to remember, you need to remember."_


	8. Chapter 8

**June 10th, 2018**

**2:30pm**

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY IWAIZUMI!!" Bokuto screamed with a big grin.

"Happy birthday Iwaizumi-san." Akaashi smiled.

Iwaizumi rubbed his eyes and smiled.

"T-Thank you guys." Iwaizumi said quietly.

"Oi, were you crying all night?" Bokuto said now with a frown on his face.

Iwaizumi nodded and sniffed a bit.

"Look, I know you're hurting right now but today is your birthday. Promise me you won't cry today." Akaashi said giving him a hug.

"Now come to the kitchen we have to show you something." Akaashi added on.

When Iwaizumi went into the kitchen, he saw a cake and some food that looked really good. They sung happy birthday to him and ate the food, Iwaizumi felt happy but as soon as he thought about being happy without Oikawa he started to cry.

"Is it really okay for me to be happy without him?" Iwaizumi thought, he started to tear up but nobody noticed.

"Okay guys, let's hurry up and go visit Oikawa." Akaashi said putting his plate in the sink.

**3:30pm**

They all agreed and hurried to finish up their food. Once they all finished their food, they went to the hospital. Oikawa had changed rooms 3 times at this point so they had to memorize the new room number. As they got to his room, they heard talking from the inside.

"Tobio-chan! Don't say that!" Oikawa giggled.

Iwaizumi hurried inside.

"Oikawa! You're awake!" Iwaizumi said.

"Uh yeah I am but who are you?" Oikawa said confused.

"He's our friend, he came to see you." Bokuto said.

Oikawa nodded his head and turned back to Kageyama. Kageyama said he had to go home, as he was leaving he said happy birthday to Iwaizumi and gave him a smile. Iwaizumi nodded and looked straight at Oikawa who was now eating some milk bread and looking out the window. Akaashi went over to Oikawa and gave him a hug.

"What's this for Akaashi." Oikawa laughed.

"You've been in the hospital for so long, I just needed to give you one." Akaashi said smiling with tears in his eyes.

"Oikawa, today is our friend's birthday." Bokuto said ruining the moment.

"Really? Well I don't know what that has to do with me but Happy birthday." Oikawa said with a grin.

"Thank you." Iwaizumi said with a soft smile.

Oikawa was way thinner than before and way paler, it looked like he was already died. Akaashi could see that Oikawa was suffering even though he was talking like his usual self, he was in pain, his eyes were always red like he's been crying. Behind the pain and sadness, he smiled. But why? Why couldn't he just show his true feelings. Oikawa started to cough up blood again but this time it was way way more than usual, he said sorry and went to the bathroom to wash the blood. They didn't call a nurse this time because Oikawa didn't have an attack where he started to have trouble breathing, it looked like he was getting better. Usually Oikawa would have been rushed somewhere but he didn't.

"Oikawa-san, we're gonna get some food. Our friend is gonna stay with you." Akaashi said by the bathroom door.

"Okay." Oikawa said calling from the other side.

Akaashi and Bokuto left and Iwaizumi sat in a sit next to Oikawa's bed. When Oikawa came out he looked straight at Iwaizumi and tilted his head.

"Why did you decide to stay here?" Oikawa asked.

"I didn't feel like going." Iwaizumi said looking at his phone.

"Oh well, can you at least talk to me? I'm literally so bored." Oikawa said rolling his eyes.

Iwaizumi noticed Oikawa was having a hard time walking, he stood up and guided Oikawa to his bed. Oikawa tensed up when he felt Iwaizumi's hands grab his arms but soon relaxed. Oikawa laid in his bed, looking up at the ceiling.

**5:45pm**

"Do you ever think about dying?" Oikawa asked suddenly, still looking at the ceiling.

"Uh sometimes, why do you ask?" Iwaizumi said now looking frightened.

"I don't know, I'm just scared that I won't get better." Oikawa said with tears in his eyes.

"You will, Don't worry about that." Iwaizumi said looking up from his phone.

When he looked up, he saw Oikawa looking at him. Iwaizumi admired everything about Oikawa, his hair, his eyes, his facial features. He didn't care that Oikawa wasn't at his best right now, he was still beautiful. Iwaizumi realized he was in love with Oikawa more than he thought. He wanted to breakdown right then and there hoping Oikawa would recognize him and call him "Iwa-chan" but it was too late already. He was already erased from his memory, everything was gone.

"Ughhhhh, I'm so bored. Talk to me." Oikawa said laughing.

"What am I supposed to talk about? Iwaizumi asked.

"I don't know, Today is your birthday right? How old are you turning? Just tell me about yourself, you never introduced yourself." Oikawa said looking deeply into Iwaizumi's eyes.

"Oh that's right well first, I turned 22, I played volleyball in my highschool years-"

"You played volleyball? Me too! I was a setter. Man I miss volleyball. What was your position?" Oikawa said cutting of Iwaizumi.

"I was actually the ace." Iwaizumi smiled.

"Really? Wow, you must be good then. What school-"

"Tooru? Here's some pills, take 1 once a day." A nurse said as she walked in.

Oikawa nodded but when the nurse walked out he stuck his tongue out at her. Iwaizumi saw everything and started laughing.

"Anyways back to what you were saying." Oikawa said giggling.

"Oh yeah, well I was the ace of my highschool volleyball team. My favorite color is teal, I like watching anime of course and I'm in college trying to be a personal trainer." Iwaizumi said deliberately avoiding questions about his name and his highschool.

"Oh that's nice, well I'm gonna tell you about me now." Oikawa said with a smirk.

"I played volleyball in highschool for Aoba Johsai, I was obviously popular with the girls like just look at me. I want to be a professional volleyball player and I'm going to make that happen after I get out of this stupid hospital." Oikawa said confidently.

"That's nice, Oikawa." Iwaizumi said fighting back his tears.

"Well, I'm kinda getting tired so I'm gonna take a nap. Wake me up when the food gets here." Oikawa said with a smile.

Iwaizumi nodded and watched as Oikawa fell asleep, he was sleeping peacefully. He looked so beautiful, Iwaizumi knew Oikawa could fight this sickness.

**6:45pm**

Iwaizumi woke up to doctor and nurses yelling and shaking him to get out of the room, it took him a minute but he realized what was going on. Doctors yelling and trying to get Oikawa's pulse back up, he sat up and ran to Oikawa's side. The nurses pulled him back and told him that he needed to get out of the room now. Iwaizumi resisted but Bokuto came running in dragging Iwaizumi out of the room, Iwaizumi fought back but it didn't work. Akaashi was waiting outside of the room, crying his heart out. The nurses shut the door behind them and Iwaizumi banged on the door to let him in, he needed to see Oikawa.

"What happened, when did I fall asleep?" Iwaizumi told Bokuto.

"I don't know when you fell asleep but when me and Akaashi came back, we saw doctors running past us. We didn't think they were for Oikawa until we heard one of the nurses say his room number, we ran all the way here." Bokuto said hugging Akaashi and trying to calm Iwaizumi down.

Iwaizumi put his hands over his head and walked back in forth, getting faster every step.

"I need to see him, I need to see him now!" Iwaizumi yelled.

"Calm down Iwaizumi-san. Please." Akaashi said.

It took a few mintues but Iwaizumi calmed down, he sat on the floor by Oikawa's room and cried. He was screaming in his head, he wanted to scream out loud but he couldn't. He was hurt, scared and lonely, he didn't want to lose his best friend. About thirty minutes later, the doctor and nurses came out with upset faces.

"H-HOW IS HE?" Iwaizumi said without realizing he raised his voice.

"I'm sorry to say this but Oikawa Tooru has passed. He passed around 6:55pm while we were trying to revive him, he did not make it. Again, I'm sorry. We tried everything we could, you can say your goodbyes now." The doctor said, he patter Iwaizumi's shoulder and left.

Iwaizumi ran inside the room to find a cold, silent, dead Oikawa on the bed. He didn't believe it, the only person he really needed was no longer here. Iwaizumi grabbed the bed's metal frame and held onto it for dear life, he was so hurt. He's tears were building up so much that it was making his eyesight blurry. Akaashi cried with his hand over his mouth and Bokuto tried his best to comfort the both of them, none of it seemed to work though.

"Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, FUCK! IS THIS MY BIRTHDAY PRESENT? YOU DEAD ON MY BIRTHDAY..? Ugh... I'm sorry Oikawa, I'm so sorry, It's all my fault. It's my fault that you got this sickness now you're dead. Please forgive me, I love you so much. I wish I did more for you, I wish I confessed to you, Please come back. I love you Oikawa." Iwaizumi said breaking down.

The doctor came in and put a sheet over Oikawa, then a nurse gave Iwaizumi a box. In the box were Oikawa'a stuff, Iwaizumi started to cry even harder. Bokuto told him that they needed to go home now, Iwaizumi was too sad to put up a fight so he went with them.


	9. Final Chapter

Iwaizumi went to his dorm instead of Akasshi and Bokuto's dorm. He set the box on his bed and looked through it, the first thing he took out of the box was a hoodie. A gray hoodie that was soft in the inside, that was Oikawa's favorite hoodie. Next was an Aoba Johsai sweater, he hugged the sweater tightly and cried. He never missed someone this much in his whole life, he was so broken. The last thing in the box was a letter, the letter read:

_june 6th, 2018._

_dear iwaizumi hajime,_

_(the love of my life, not really because we're not dating but yeah. also i'm too lazy to right any uppercase letters, like i can anyway. this sickness is taking over me so badly, i can't even walk 10 steps without getting tired ^ - ^)_

_you’re probably reading this after i’ve lost my fight (like i’m dead :o) but i want to write this before i die and yes i'm going to die, i won't get cured. i don't know when i'm going to though. It would be so clichéif i died on your birthday LMAOO, i would literally feel so bad if i did though._

"It's okay Oikawa, I forgive you." Iwaizumi smiled.

_i want you to know that i've been in love with you ever since our 3rd year of high school. i fell in love with you i don't know why but i did. i was so scared to tell you LMAO- but a few years later and i thought i really had a chance, but when we went to that lover's restaurant and you found asami, i just lost hope. she made you really happy and i hope you guys are going to be together forever._

"Yeah right." Iwaizumi rolled his eyes.

_i'm glad that i met you, you've stuck with me for so long and i don't know how to show you that i appreciate you with all my life. i'm sorry things had to end like this, i really wanted to have a future with you. i bet you'll make a great personal trainer, i wished i could live longer for you to be my personal trainer. oh boy i would have that a lot. tell tobio-chan that he needs to win every game for me and if he doesn't i'll be laughing and comforting him up in heaven or hell idk LMAO. tell him that i'm cheering for him and i'll always be looking out for him. oh boy i'm getting tired already, anyways. iwaizumi hajime don't blame yourself, it's not your fault. it's mine for falling in love with you. live on, don’t forget about me. find happiness in someone else. i'm sorry, forgive me for forgetting. i love you <33 see you in the after life._

_your best friend,_

_oikawa tooru_

Iwaizumi's face was wet with all his tears, he tried his best to not get any tears on his letter. he didn't want to smudge anything. Iwaizumi couldn't take it anymore, he was gonna sleep it off. He turned around and made his way to Oikawa's bed and laid on it. He smiled and closed his eyes.

"I love you Tooru." Iwaizumi said smiling.

_"I love you too Hajime."_

He heard a voice, he opened his eyes and looked around nobody was there. He smiled again Iwaizumi was very tired, he closed his eyes.

"Don't worry, I'll be joining you soon Oikawa."

He turned to his side and when doing so an empty pill bottle with Oikawa’s name on it fell on the floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!! I hope you liked this story! I procrastinated on it for sooo long but I finally finished it! I also posted this on my wattpad account which is @ haikyuuangststories !! you should check it out, I’ll be writing more stories on there than on here. Have a great day/night, hopefully you cried as much as I did :))

**Author's Note:**

> crying bruh :))


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